[Friday Funny] Kids are Quick

[The Friday Funny]

Mostly old, but still funny...

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TEACHER:   Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA:         Here it is.
TEACHER:  Correct.  Now Class, who discovered America ?
CLASS:         Maria.
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TEACHER:  John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN:         You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN:         K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER:  No, that's wrong
GLENN:         Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD:     H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER:  What are you talking about?
DONALD:     Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER:  Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE:       Me!
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TEACHER:  Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN:           Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER:    Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'
MILLIE:           I is..
TEACHER:    No, Millie....  Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE:           All right...  'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
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TEACHER:   George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.  Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS:          Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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TEACHER:  Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON:        No Sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER:    Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's.  Did you copy his?
CLYDE:       No, Sir.  It's the same dog.
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TEACHER:  Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD:   A teacher.

-- 
Peter SJF Bance
http://www.minstrel.org.uk/